tongue in cheek

Day 16

Submitted by Zombieman on Tue, 04/14/2020 - 15:09

I journeyed out to the store. Worry not fellow social distancing warriors, I was well armed, covered in head to toe with a survival suit made of an old shower curtain and brief in my time amongst the unwashed.  We truly are in the midst of suffering and misery; I went to purchase tortilla chips and there were none to be found.

Day 12

Submitted by Zombieman on Fri, 04/10/2020 - 15:04

It has been a while since I loosened my fingers at you. Things here in the lockdown are nearing an end. At least that’s what the politicians say, soon we’ll all be out at the bars, movies and festivals like we were in past years. No vaccine? No worries, it would probably give you autism anyway and none of us wants autism. Will we have herd immunity? No, but herd immunity is for the lessor animals, so go out and cough on everyone. Yes, looking forward to the return of glory days gives me a golden globe of warmth deep in my cockles.

And on the 7th Day....

Submitted by Zombieman on Sun, 04/05/2020 - 13:52

Breakfast! That time of the morning, during a pandemic, where I sit and ponder how much worse the world has become while drinking my coffee. I gave up breakfast eating a long time ago. I didn’t give up breakfast foods, mind, just eating in the AM (the first 12 hours of the day for you non-Americans). The problem is sleep. As in, I’m getting less of it. Not the ‘good less’ which would be me staying up until 3 in the morning playing video games or changing a carburetor, no, I’m getting the ‘bad less’.

Sixth day

Submitted by Zombieman on Sat, 04/04/2020 - 14:53

Politics! I have discovered that while I have been passing my time in isolation a whole other ‘thing’ has been going on! I’m not so sure of the ins and outs of the people we elected, but some people say they did a bad job and the people elected are saying they are doing a great job. Who is right? I could spend years analyzing the data and probably never come up with an answer. All I know is people are dying and it is someone’s fault and the opinions on who is to blame are very much up for debate. So exciting!

Day 5

Submitted by Zombieman on Fri, 04/03/2020 - 21:33

Everything is the same. My options today resemble those I had every other day of this trial. Except for food of course, my options there are dwindling. I have noticed the greatest difficulty of this time is nothing changes. I wake, my room is the same, no new doodads greet my waking eyes, no new animals bound joyfully into my room to lick me into consciousness.

Day two

Submitted by Zombieman on Tue, 03/31/2020 - 21:47

The quarantine has entered a new phase, I've lost track of the days, I am sure I must be on day 2, but with so much time having passed it can be hard to tell. Alas food supplies are already running low, with only fresh veggies, beef, pork chops, marinated chicken breast, cheese, cream, coffee, candy, chips, tortillas and other items too numerous to list, left to eat. For exercise I am forced to walk the perimeter of the property, a mere acre, though the sun falling upon my face does bring me joy, it is short lived as I look at the devastation the virus has wrought.